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A Wolf at the Table: A Memoir of My Father


by Augusten Burroughs

List Price: $24.95
Price: $16.47
You Save: $8.48 (34%)
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Sales Rank: 1862
Studio: St. Martin's Press
Binding: Hardcover
Number Of Pages: 256
Publication Date: April 29, 2008
Publisher: St. Martin's Press


EDITORIAL REVIEWS

Product Description

“As a little boy, I had a dream that my father had taken me to the woods where there was a dead body. He buried it and told me I must never tell. It was the only thing we’d ever done together as father and son, and I promised not to tell. But unlike most dreams, the memory of this one never left me. And sometimes…I wasn’t altogether sure about one thing: was it just a dream?”

When Augusten Burroughs was small, his father was a shadowy presence in his life: a form on the stairs, a cough from the basement, a silent figure smoking a cigarette in the dark. As Augusten grew older, something sinister within his father began to unfurl.  Something dark and secretive that could not be named. 

Betrayal after shocking betrayal ensued, and Augusten’s childhood was over. The kind of father he wanted didn’t exist for him. This father was distant, aloof, uninterested…

And then the “games” began.

With A Wolf at the Table, Augusten Burroughs makes a quantum leap into untapped emotional terrain: the radical pendulum swing between love and hate, the unspeakably terrifying relationship between father and son. Told with scorching honesty and penetrating insight, it is a story for anyone who has ever longed for unconditional love from a parent. Though harrowing and brutal, A Wolf at the Table will ultimately leave you buoyed with the profound joy of simply being alive. It’s a memoir of stunning psychological cruelty and the redemptive power of hope.

 


Amazon.com
Amazon Significant Seven, April 2008: When I started reading A Wolf at the Table, I thought I knew what to expect. Augusten Burroughs captures intense experience with an inexplicably cool remove, imparting a stillness and purity to emotions that would likely run amok in anyone else's hands. I love this quality of his writing, and it's present in full force in this memoir of a childhood spent in thrall to a predatory and deeply unpredictable father. What I wasn't prepared for was the suspense--the dread-filled, nearly sonorous waiting for the worst to happen. An artful sort of bait-and-switch happens in the telling: Burroughs brings you to the brink of a terrible catharsis more than once, but the break in tension never comes. It is profoundly sad, remarkably tender, and fueled by a sense of love and reverence that only a child knows. --Anne Bartholomew



CUSTOMER REVIEWS (Average Customer Rating: 3.5 based on 103 reviews)

Is this book an example of "Creative Nonfiction?"  
I disliked this book so much that I didn't even finish it. Mr. Burroughs has clearly run out of material from his own life and seems unable or unwilling to try fiction again. The thing I find most disturbing about this 'memoir' is that I saw Mr. Burroughs at a book reading when Magical Thinking was released and he spoke about his father and how they had reconciled. He also mentioned that he was working on this book at the time and that it had already been optioned to be filmed by a major studio, which was pretty impressive considering the book hadn't even been completed. I wonder how much of his recollection was influenced by the notion that A Wolf at the Table was going to be a movie (although that seems unlikely now, given the critical drubbing the book has received and the poor box office performance of "Running With Scissors.") In fact, during the Q&A, an audience member asked what he thought of "creative nonfiction" writers like David Sadaris (a writer who admits to changing his stories based on audience reactions at readings) and Mr. Burroughs said he had no problem with either the term or concept as long as the book is entertaining. Unfortunately, this book is not.
September 03, 2008

Why...............  
are people like Burroughs' father allowed to procreate? This story was so sad, but there were amusing moments. I am amazed that one can come through a childhood like his and still feel such obvious love for his parents (I blame his mother too). It's a tribute to his character that he was able to survive and be successful in his life after the madness he was exposed to. Disturbing as this book was, I have always loved his writing and look forward to his next book.
September 01, 2008

Fact or Dramatic Fiction?  
First,I should disclose that I am a fan of Augusten Burroughs. I even have a desire to meet him someday, perhaps in Northampton,MA, near where I live. I envision lively discussions and comical observations being shared-but I digress....

Having read all of Mr. Burroughs books except for Sellivision, I was eagerly looking forward to this admitted 'change' in tone. I was looking forward to reading a straightforward yet harrowing tale about a difficult father. The cover of the book is menacing enough what with animated, red fork spikes reaching towards some imaginary prey (Augusten?).

I wasn't looking for a laugh, so I'm not disappointed that I didn't laugh out loud every few paragraphs as I did while reading his other books. I am disappointed though. More to the point, I feel deceived. While I'm sure each of the stories presented here started as an authentic memory, the embellishments are just too impossible to swallow.

For one, these memories are supposedly told from the perspective of a child (as young as 1 and 1/2!) but are so impossibly detailed that truth gets jettisoned for the sake of drama: "Sitting in my high chair, I held a saltine cracker up to my eye and peered through the tiny holes, astonished that I could see so much through such small opening...." Really? (And that's just one example).

Here's what happened to me while reading this book: I felt so much here was fabricated for dramatic effect that I went online and googled information about Augusten's father and mother. John Robison (Augusten's father) was an adored professor in the philosophy department at UMASS, Amherst where I have done doctoral work. Margaret Robison, his mom, is still alive and lives in Shelburne Falls,MA where she writes poetry and is working on a memoir herself.

Here's what I also learned: Mr. Burroughs actual name is Chris Robison, even though there are (supposedly) direct quotes in this book where people refer to Chris as Augusten (he didn't change his name until well after the events of this book). This is problematic enough but the fact that 'Augusten' hasn't seen his (sick, stroke-ridden) mother in 8 years so decisively shifts my sympathies to her-and even to his father. There are "memories" here so specific that he would have HAD to have consulted his mom to verify if he had the story straight. But...

It seems, unfortunately, that sobriety (and stability) have left this pseudonymous writer with little material with which to work with except questionable 'memories' of his childhood. Recently, he's resorted to viral marketing via the use of You Tube and a blog and has even promoted his brother's book (about Asperger's Syndrome) in this manner. At some point, the author-as-victim theme grows tired-especially in this case, where most of the memories here are 30+ years old.

Still, I don't begrudge his success and comfortable new life- he is bold to have shared so many potentially embarrassing details of his life.
Whatever his true name, he has certainly paid his dues but the "wolf" at the table was more likely a stressed-out professor dealing with alcoholism, a difficult marriage and poor health. That the wolf didn't pay enough attention to his young son is tragic but I am doubtful, given Burroughs's creative mind, that the neglect morphed into life-threatening scenarios time and again.

In the end you will empathize with him because a hole will always remain in his life where a father's love should reside. This is what's real about this book and Burroughs's life, and always will be (a fact that he has tattooed on his arms lately, to wit: "the scar remains").

September 01, 2008

Good read, but not as entertaining as "Running with Scissors"  
This book is far darker than "Running with Scissors". Very little humor, dark or otherwise, throughout the entire book, yet still a good analytical read about the relationship (or non-relationship) between one boy and his father. Delves quite well into the childhood perceptions children have of the adult world.
August 31, 2008

Audiobook truly unique and heart wrenching  
Unlike many reviewers, this is the first book I have read by Augusten Burroughs and I understand it is a serious departure from his other books (of which I plan to read of course!). I listened to the audiobook read by the author, containing many original songs written by artists at special request by Burroughs, in direct response to reading the book. The music concept was great and Burroughs did an excellent job reading this book; you could feel every scrap of emotion as he recounted some pretty horrible experiences with his biological father.

One thing this book did for me is draw a clear separation between having a flawed or dysfunctional parent versus having a flawed parent who is completely void of attachment or emotion. I could totally relate to the beating of the head against an emotional brick wall and the salivating desire to gain parental approval at almost any cost. Many of us have experienced a parent's disapproval or disappointment, perhaps non-acceptance of a lifestyle choice, but even these things are bearable if there is some sort of underlying love there. But this man did not love his son,(indeed was incapable of loving anyone) and seemed to actually gain pleasure from seeing his son struggle with his rejection and odd, scary behavior. I can completely understand why Burroughs believes this guy is evil - if the examples in the book are accurately described, it is clear the man was heartless; "soulless".

Burroughs got a bum deal in the father department and even though his resulting struggles may have helped him become a stronger, empathetic and creative person (a "soul" survivor), I cannot help but be absolutely enraged and devastated on his behalf. That primary need for nurturing and unconditional love that can only be bestowed by a loving parent leaves a hole in the heart that must be constantly self-tended. The adult Burroughs seems to have come into his own and found some peace. But that foundation that should have been laid solid and strong, packed and finished with love and tenderness by his parents, will always have to be checked for flaws, weaknesses and pitfalls. Burroughs' father neglected his son's soul the way he neglected the deck of his childhood home. Nothing can replace the father he should have had and Burroughs justly mourns this. Ironically, that quality which his father lacked (empathy) is owned by Burroughs in abundance and is exactly what makes this legacy so painful for him, and this book so heartwrenching for the reader. The little kid in me can't help but shriek, "THAT SUCKS AND IT IS SO UNFAIR!!"

So Augusten - here is my message to you: you are okay, you are enough just as you are, you were a good boy and you were a great son and you deserved so much better. Your father missed out on the wonder that is you. :-( Children are a gift given to us for such a short time and we have so much power to screw them up. Let Burroughs book remind us all to cherish our children consciously and raise them with love, understanding, knowledge and grace.
August 27, 2008


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