Product Description
From the world's most-acclaimed expert on verbal abuse comes the first book that answers the question foremost in every woman's mind: can he really change? Combining practical applications with the latest clinical research with the trademark support and assurance of Evans, "The Verbally Abusive Man: Can He change?" shows victims of verbal abuse how to empower themselves, improve their relationships, and change their lives for the better.

CUSTOMER REVIEWS (Average Customer Rating: 4.5 based on 10 reviews)

The Verbally Abusive Man Can He Change?

I recommend this to ANY woman who is having relationship issues not just those who are completely aware of verbal abuse. If you find after a few years in the relationship that you are no longer who you use to be, or you feel like your going crazy for no apparent reason... or have uneasiness whenever your significant other is around but you can't pinpoint why - there is no physical abuse going on... you just constantly feel like your walking on egg shells. it may be verbal abuse that is going on, and this is something that is hardly recognized by anyone, even trained counselors unless they are trained in verbal abuse.
September 24, 2008

most insightful and eye-opening

I read this book and presented the "Agreement" to my husband about one month ago. First off - It really got his attention! He was almost speechless for a few days! It has made a remarkable difference in the tone around our house. He read about half the book and is now reading "Controlling People" also by Patricia Evans. He admitted that he has done "some of that and doesn't want to do it anymore." The Verbal Abuse Level is down by about 75 % or so! Not only has he stopped most of his verbal abuse, but I've stopped tolerating it, so I'm feeling better about that. I know this isn't all that needs to be done to heal our relationship. I do believe it is a major beginning in tackling the behaviors that have caused a great deal of pain in our relationship. I recommend this book to anyone willing to do the work and follow through with the agreement!
June 06, 2008

A Lifesaving Reference

This book is amazing in how true to the real life situation of verbal abuse it is. All I have to do after hearing my husband plead that he is changing is read a chapter or two of this book and I realize he is not changing at all. Ms. Evans tells us how to determine whether or not all of the criteria for change are being met as well as gently guides us to a deeper understanding of verbal abuse through real-life examples and well structured chapters.
May 05, 2008

Happy... but...

I am very happy Patricia wrote this book and I appreciate her work very much and have recommended it to a lot of women, but I would also like to recommend all of you to also read "Why does he do that". It is written by a man called Lundy who has worked with hundreds of abusive men in his clinic. I think his book is the best one around on this topic, it was an eye opener for me and I never allowed myself to be abused again after reading "Why does he do that". Because this book made it so clear what the game is the abuser plays. Lundy tells us that only a few brave men change. Why is that? Because being abusive pays off - abusive men get to manipulate others and have them do what they want them to do. It is a POWER OVER game! Most abusive men do not want to see what they have done, it takes a lot a courage to face your own deamons. So most do not change. They go on and find another lady to abuse. When you feel abused, you are abused! Do not allow such thing in your life for any reason what so ever. It's not worth it. And relationships without respect just does not last.
February 12, 2008

An important resource for determining if an abusive man can change

Communication specialist Patricia Evans explores the issue of verbal abuse in heterosexual relationships. She builds on her previous work in The Verbally Abusive Relationship and Controlling People by posing the question, "Can a verbally abusive man really change?" What is particularly startling about verbal abuse, Evans explains, is that in almost every case the abuser feels that he is the one being attacked. (Rarely, abusers are female, but such cases aren't discussed in this book.) Getting him to own up to his damaging behavior is not easy. Motivating him to change is even more difficult. Evans supplies tools you can use to determine if your partner is likely to change and a program that can help him do so, if you think he can alter his abusive behavior. Evans uses her book as a pulpit to preach against unqualified therapists, verbal abuse in all its forms and the male-dominated society that has made such abuse possible. But, her cause is just, and we recommend this important resource to anyone who is struggling to survive an abusive relationship and to therapists who are seeking solid information.
November 29, 2007

SIMILAR PRODUCTS

The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond
by Patricia Evans

Controlling People: How to Recognize, Understand, and Deal with People Who Try to Control You
by Patricia Evans

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
by Lundy Bancroft

Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out; On relationship and recovery
by Patricia Evans

The Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing
by Beverly Engel