Product Description
Over the past thirty-five years, Between Parent and Child has helped millions of parents around the world strengthen their relationships with their children. Written by renowned psychologist Dr. Haim Ginott, this revolutionary book offered a straightforward prescription for empathetic yet disciplined child rearing and introduced new communication techniques that would change the way parents spoke with, and listened to, their children. Dr. Ginott’s innovative approach to parenting has influenced an entire generation of experts in the field, and now his methods can work for you, too. In this revised edition, Dr. Alice Ginott, clinical psychologist and wife of the late Haim Ginott, and family relationship specialist Dr. H. Wallace Goddard usher this bestselling classic into the new century while retaining the book’s positive message and Haim Ginott’s warm, accessible voice. Based on the theory that parenting is a skill that can be learned, this indispensable handbook will show you how to:• Discipline without threats, bribes, sarcasm, and punishment• Criticize without demeaning, praise without judging, and express anger without hurting • Acknowledge rather than argue with children’s feelings, perceptions, and opinions• Respond so that children will learn to trust and develop self-confidence

CUSTOMER REVIEWS (Average Customer Rating: 5.0 based on 38 reviews)

baisbook for parents by T. M. Koster-sanders (europe)

5 Stars
November 04, 2009
This book is a must for parents! The approach that the writer suggets, is very important for the development of children and their selfesteem

Great ideas for raising children by Holly Abrams (Louisville, KY)

5 Stars
August 19, 2009
This book has given me some concrete steps for improving how I treat my child. I have been using them as I have been reading the book and the ideas are very valid. I look forward to seeing how they work in the long haul.

Mediocre, repetitive, often wrong and certainly grossly overrated by FILIP Marius (Bucharest, ROMANIA)

2 Stars
August 18, 2009
Like many other parents who have heard about this all famous classic, I've read this book with great eagerness. The disappointment produced by is is not negligible, so I give it two stars out of five. Judged in isolation, perhaps this book deserves three stars. But considering this book is a famous classic, two stars is more appropriate. After finishing reading it, I had the impulse to give it one star only. But considering this book is a famous classic, two stars is more appropriate. The book fails to deliver both in form and in content. First of all, the form. The book consists of ten chapters, one epilogue and three appendices. The core of the book is formed of the ten chapters. Each chapter addresses one major problem, more or less in isolation. Each chapter is formed of sections, each section addressing one aspect of the major problem addressed by the chapter. So far, so good: the book seems well organized, with no piece information overlapping senselessly other areas. The problem with this approach is that this book is not meant to be descriptive. It is not a scientific treaty describing the problems that may arise between parent and child. It is a formative book, something that is supposed to teach the parents something. Because learning is an evolutionary process, the gradual growth in understanding should have been reflected by the book's structure. Imagine that: you are a parent, you want to improve the relationship with your child and you use this book to help yourself. How do you start and where from? How do you design a program that teaches you what to do? What should come first? Is there a difference in importance between various parts? Nothing in the book suggests anything in this direction. In terms of form, that's not all. As mentioned above, each section addresses one aspect of the main problem of the chapter. The author provides explanations, principles and examples (the "case studies" which are pervasive in all self-help psychology books). The problem is that there is not clear division between the three. Sometimes the section starts with an explanation, introduces a "case study" (with no separation between the two) only to continue with explanation after the "case study" as if we're not reading a book containing a minimum of rigor but we're listening to casual talk. If the form of this book is less than perfect, it is the CONTENT that leaves the most to desire. Remembering its content, I am still amazed at how this material became an all time classic. The greatest sin this book commits is that it doesn't do what it preaches. It says over and over that the parents are judgmental towards their children; that they start criticizing the children when they should start with empathy and understanding. Yet, when addressing the parent, the author does EXACTLY the same: he begins with criticizing the parent and only afterward continues with what the parent has to do. The book rightfully states that "love and patience" are meaningless words in the absence of effective educational skills. Yet, the only thing it does it to replace "love and patience" with "empathy and understanding". The "empathy and understanding" occurs so pervasively throughout the book that it becomes something like a miraculous potion that heals any wound and cures any illness. Is "empathy and understanding" any more obvious than "love and patience"? I believe it is not; "empathy and understanding" may be words just as empty as "love and patience" in the absence of effective communicational skills. Skills that, obviously, "Between Parent and Child" fails to teach. The book is flooded with "case studies" that employ a myriad of "real names". For instance, in the first five pages of the book, the reader gets acquainted with Andy, Nancy, Carol, Susie, Alice, Lea and David. I think the number of characters approaches one hundred for the whole book. Why so many names? Why not naming all John or Mary, forget the false sense of "reality" and stick with the message these "case studies" are supposed to transmit? Speaking of "case studies", the situations they present are, in many cases, so far from reality that they cannot be taken seriously. Does anyone believe that an angry child will instantaneously calm down upon hearing his parent uttering the idiotic remark "I know how you feel: you feel angry"? Not only that the "case studies" are outright false in many cases, but they preach false methods, too. Trying to respond "calmly" to bad behavior may be a great incentive to continue and extend that bad behavior. The author seems to postulate that children are angelic beings, filled with a transcendental moral scent and all we have to do is to manifest "empathy and understanding" towards the feelings of the child, no matter how bad or destructive those might be. This is utterly false. The author is wrong when he states that "emotions are like rivers, we can divert them but never suppress them". Recent studies in anger management proved that behavior DOES control emotions and that emotions can be EXTINGUISHED or EXTENDED through behavioral control. Just as "unleashing" the anger does nothing else than increasing the anger, an attitude of unconditional "empathy and understanding" towards negative emotions does not necessarily diminish them, but may increase them. The book is right into saying that we should punish behavior but understand emotions. Yet, it fails to acknowledge that such attitude requires a deep change in the parent. Nobody becomes overnight skillful at making the distinction between the behavior (which must be punished and corrected) and the character (which must be protected and nourished). The parent needs help, determination, a comprehensive plan and plenty of time to achieve that - things that this book says nothing about. What you hear instead is that you have to give "empathy and understanding", the same litany you get from a priest who tells you to stop sinning today without ever showing you how to attain such goal. To conclude the many drawbacks of this book's content, I must say that some advices are outright dangerous. For instance, it suggests that the child be left alone to decide when to go to bed, when to wake up, how to organize his learning effort for school, and so on. This is sheer nonsense. Putting so much responsibility upon the shoulders of a 7 yo child is absurd. Learning how to use someone's own intellectual capacities, to learn how to learn, is perhaps the greatest achievement that organized schooling produces in children. Learning how to learn takes years and years of exercise, from kindergarten to college. Is the parent supposed to leave his child alone in his most important intellectual endeavor? I doubt that very much. Finally, at the root of all the ills of "Between Parent and Child" lies the fact that the author believes he knows what is our fundamental duty as parents. More precisely, we have, first and foremost, not to upset the child, to ensure a warm climate in the house and to make everything in our powers that no emotional turmoil ever touches our little ones. While these are good and noble goals, it is doubtful that everyone considers such things as his most important duty as a parent and I doubt even more that anyone has the right to suggest what is fundamentally good for someone's child. With all its risks, the essential duty and the most fundamental decisions of child rearing stay with the parents. That's why I prefer books that show methods and principles while abstaining from preaching values. One such book is "Family Rules" by Dr. Kenneth Kaye, which one can also find on Amazon.

Between Parent and Child by Irene Gardner (Ogden, UT USA)

4 Stars
August 14, 2009
This book came highly recommended as a parenting tool. I bought it as a gift for my daughter, husband and two small sons. My hope is that they are reading it together as they attend parenting classes for family unity.

Best parenting advise available by L. Kelson (Los Angeles CA)

5 Stars
August 01, 2009
Dr Hyman Ginott understands the relationship between children and adults. He also makes excellent suggestions to help guide the relationship.

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